I haven't written anything here in... *looks at last post* oh, about 9 months. Actually, I haven't written anything at all since that time.

Iba pala yung nawala ko nung nangyari yung nangyari sa nakaraang taon. Hindi pala ikaw kundi ako.

I feel like my life has been a series of transition periods for the past two years. Single to unofficially-not-single then bam! straight back to single. College student to college graduate to happy bum to unemployed-and-pressured-to-get-a-job-bum to working girl. From happy because I didn't know what else was out there to very happy once I knew to fucked up because it was gone to this numb state I'm currently in.

It's all been a bit confusing. It's like a game of hide and seek with sanity and I'm It.

A crucial part of choices and risks is not really about the consequences. It’s about that moment that you make the choice. The point where you decide that “this is what I have to do. And I’m going to do it.”

Everything will fall into place from there. It won’t always be easy but it will be worth it. You can’t stay stuck at the fork in the road or go back the way you came. Keep moving forward. Keep walking. Make a choice.

Your direction may be unclear but at least you stay in motion, you know that there is a destination. The more you walk, the clearer it gets.

Don’t be afraid. In life, we will always have signs, companions and guides. As long as we keep moving, we keep living.

--excerpt from A Rainy Sunday Afternoon with a Cup of Homemade Hot Chocolate and Ensaymada, written on April 27, 2008

You don't fall in love expecting or knowing... half the time you won't know what the hell you're doing. But I guess when it happens, the best we can do is to want it to last and to work at it. See, I believe that relationships are a one-way, two-person development.

Some people I know sometimes forget that while they're with someone, they're still independent of that person. Hypothetical girlfriend should not always make hypothetical boyfriend do what she wants and vice-versa. Draw the line with what you want to change in the person and how. Because there's still that point that you fell in love with this person because of how he/she is. Easy on the editing, honey. Don't just cut  and cut and cut and then paste to make the other person your IDEAL. I mean, what's the fun in perfection? Learn to appreciate the person's HUMANITY.

You guys are a COUPLE. Not a single entity. Let the other person have his/her own world too. I mean, when you think about it, they had a whole other life before you. Besides, you have a shared world anyway.

So it's one-way because you're together, "on the same path/journey" blah blah blah but two-person because you have different ways of... er.. growing. And duh, like I said, two people. TWO.

Sometimes I like to stick my head out of the window and stare at the patch of sky that's barely visible between all the concrete that comprises much of the Makati skyline. Watching the clouds move slowly just reminds me that everything moves. Clouds, cars, people, continents, and especially intangible things such as time. Things move, people move on. They move at different speeds, some slower than others. But they are constantly moving.

The winds of change. We all get to where we need to be. Eventually.

It'll all be okay. Eventually.